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Parent's Academy › Developmental Milestones › Language Development › Potty Training for Late Talkers

Potty Training for Late Talkers

Stacie bennett.

Speech-Language Pathologist , Trenton , New Jersey

Jan 18, 2022 Unfortunately, potty training takes a lot of time and even more patience. I’m a firm believer that children will use the potty consistently when they are ready, but having a speech delay MAY make it more difficult for your child.

In This Article

Increase your child’s vocabulary with speech blubs, 1. set a schedule, 2. praise them, 3. rewards can go a long way, 4. prepare yourself for the journey, 5. make a little chart, 6. take them with you, when you go, 7. let them pick their underwear.

Children learning to use the bathroom also learn the vocabulary associated with potty training. If your toddler has a speech delay,  they may not be able to tell you when they have to go  or if they’ve already had an accident. 

Speech Blubs app is the perfect tool for late talkers to work on fantastic communication-centered activities. Start your free trial today and explore engaging activities your child will love and benefit from.

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It’s important to realize that even though your child may not have the verbal means to tell you when they have to go to the bathroom, they may be giving you subtle  non-verbal cues or gestures . It’s important to watch your child and see if they are doing anything consistent when they go to the bathroom. My daughter will do a “pee-pee”  dance in a circle  when she has to go (she still does this even though she’s been potty trained for 7 months). 

There are a couple tips that I’ll share with you to (hopefully) make potty training a little bit easier! These are more from a mother’s perspective, with some speech therapist tips thrown in!

7 Potty Training Tips for Late Talkers

If you firmly believe your child is ready, then 45 minutes or so after they eat or drink, place them on the potty. Leave them there for 3 minutes and see if they go. If they do . . .

Make a big deal out of the smallest trickle! Give high fives, tell them they are doing awesome, and show them what they did. Accidents do happen. Try not to be too hard on them. Tell them, calmly that they should go to the bathroom in the toilet, not in their pants. 

We used a sticker chart and skittles for my daughter. When she went to my mother-in-law’s house, she got M&Ms. It made her excited to know she was getting something different in each house.

Read some books on the subject and, if all else fails, GOOGLE. Make sure you have tons of underwear, a reward system in place, everyone in the house is on board, and be patient.

If your child can’t tell you “pee” or “poo,” make a little chart. I’m talking one or two pictures; one of the toilet and one of the sink (wash hands). Make sure, when they go, you say “pee” or “poo” so they know what they did.

I know it might sound odd, but I always took Nora with me and, even though he’s a boy, Nicholas goes with me, too. I narrate EVERYTHING I do in the bathroom. I’ll say, Mommy went pee-pee, now mommy is wiping, mommy has to pull up her pants, etc. Don’t forget, it’s more than just the vocabulary words for potty that they need to know. How can you expect them to pull down their pants, if they don’t know what pants are?

Have your child pick out their own underwear. This makes them excited and signals that they are big kids now. 

As someone who just went through this process, it can be daunting. We tried to get our daughter on the toilet at two years old, but she had no idea when she had to go. We decided that she would let us know when she was ready and she totally did. I was only two months postpartum with my son when she suddenly said, “Mommy, I have to go to pee-pee.” I was like, “Well, I guess we are doing this.” 

Good luck and remember, none of us go to  kindergarten  in pull-ups! Your child will get it! 💪

In addition to these tips, you can download our  Speech Blubs app  and work on some of our fantastic communication-centered activities.

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The author’s views are entirely his or her own and may not necessarily reflect the views of Blub Blub Inc. All content provided on this website is for informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for independent professional medical judgement, advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website.

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Potty Training with a Speech Delay: 4 Things I Learned

One mom shares how her toddler's expressive language disorder impacted their potty learning journey (or didn't)....

Amelia Kinsolving brings years of experience supporting children through the potty training process in the daycare and behavior therapy setting to the Confident Parenting team (not to mention recently training her own toddler!)

Amelia, Bernadette and Erica are moms supporting moms (and all parents) on the path to better sleep and smoother potty training, since 2010. Confident Parenting has worked with the families of over 1,300 babies and children and was named “Best Sleep Consultants” by the Main Line Parent and Philadelphia Family communities in 2021, their 7th and 8th accolade from parents!

For more information about sleep or potty training support or their approach to sleep learning, visit BeAConfidentParent.com.

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The Therapy Place

Flushed With Pride: Toilet Training For Kids With Developmental Delays

December 15, 2021

Toilet training is a challenging and frustrating time for all parents, but even more so for parents of children with developmental delays, disabilities, or sensory issues.

At The Therapy Place, we are here to help you with the challenging task of toilet training your child with developmental delays.

As a parent of a child with developmental delays or autism, you already have more insight than anyone else on how your child responds in daily situations such as eating, sharing toys, and reaction to discipline. This kind of insight will be crucial in helping your child reach the next stage of development through potty training. 

Every milestone that your child reaches is a reason to celebrate! Nothing is taken for granted. Toilet training is another one of these stages that you as a parent will work through. 

Children with autism may sometimes reach their developmental milestones later than other children. It is not uncommon for these children to only achieve success with toilet training at the age of 4 or 5 years.

It is a challenge for parents of children with developmental delays to see other children reach milestones easily whereas their child struggles. Their child needs to be taught everything, from sitting on the potty or training seat to wanting to pee or poop and then wiping to obtain a clean result.

As a parent of children with special needs, it is recommended that you do not try to do this alone. It can be an emotional rollercoaster. Use the resources available in parent magazines, consult with therapists at The Therapy Place as well as parents who are in the same boat.

At The Therapy Place , we have researched potty training for children who need extra help, and we have useful tricks and hints to help parents at each stage of toilet training.

When Will My Child Be Ready for Toilet Training?

Boys and girls experience toilet training differently. Your child’s “readiness” to start toilet training may be later than children without challenges. There is no set age at which a child is ready for toilet training. It depends on their physical ability to control the bladder and bowel.  

The physical aspect involved in toilet training involves your child knowing how to release their muscles, and the subsequent sensations of peeing or pooping. They might find this new sensation uncomfortable.

Signs That Your Child Is Ready For Potty Training

As a parent, there are certain signs you can look out for to know that your child is ready to start potty training. This can be things such as your child jumping up and down doing “the potty dance” or squirming to signal that they must go. They may point to their nappy to tell you that it is wet, or that there is poop in the nappy. Signs such as these tell you that your child is starting to become aware of their toilet habits, and they’re ready to start the transition. 

Try to recognize the warning signs that they want to go to the toilet and react to them as soon as you see these signals and follow your routine to go to the toilet. Although it can seem daunting, try not to delay moving away from diapers when you see these signs. Move your child into underwear or pull-ups as soon as possible as soon as you see the signs.

In some cases, children with autism may not have any of these usual signs of needing to go to the toilet like crossing their legs or holding or pressing their groins. It may take a couple of extra steps to help your child communicate clearly. 

A suggestion is that you ask them to communicate with you in a short sentence. Tell them to show you when they need to go to the toilet, or when they might have an accident. 

What To Do When Your Child Has An Accident

Not only is the sensory issue of being wet a problem, but the feeling of failure can also become an issue. It’s important to let your child know that accidents are normal when potty training, whether there are developmental delays or not.   

Let your child change and set a timer for half-hourly intervals for them to try again. Smile and praise your child when they make a pee or poop. We know that this process can be frustrating for you as a parent but reassure your child that we all make mistakes and that is how we learn. 

Helpful Tips For Starting Toilet Training

At The Therapy Place, we’ve picked up several different tips and tricks to help with potty training. Some are tried and tried methods and others may work for one parent and not work for another. The important thing is to remain flexible and patient. The Therapy Place is here to help you make this transition, and answer any questions you may have! 

Choosing The Training Potty

One neat trick is to start by introducing toilet training for children by letting them choose the color of the potty. 

If you already have a potty from another sibling, let your child take the potty and put it in the bathroom. Let them get used to sitting on the potty and the training seat on top of the toilet. Ask your child “Is the potty good?” Do you like the toilet seat more?”

Use Visual Cues

Remember to use the visual cues and stick them on the bathroom wall. This will alleviate stress and resistance to toileting. 

It gives a clear sign to your child that as soon as your child is finished in the bathroom your child can go back to the activity or television show or play with their toys.

Use Simplified Langauge

Children with developmental delays, autism, and ADHD, as well as children with language impairment, require repetition of information or for the instruction to be simplified for it to be understood and processed. For example, they may not understand “Let’s go to the bathroom,” or “Do you want to Poop?”. Instead, a simplified version would be to say, “come poo in the potty”.

Here are some more examples of simplified language to use at different steps of toilet training:

• It’s time to go use the potty.  
• Take your nappy or training pants off
• Talk about the nappy and training let
• Tell your child to sit on the potty or training seat to feel which one is more comfortable.
• Do you want to sit on the potty or the seat?
• Talk about each stage of the process so that it is not something to be frightened about.
• Ask if they are finished
• Teach them to wipe their bottom
• Wash their hands

Your child may have difficulty as they feel the difference between using a diaper and using the toilet. Always remember to talk to your child with a developmental delay about what is happening as the poop is coming out. It may seem normal for us, but this is brand new for them! Talk about the process, explain what’s happening, and be patient with them.

Do the same as you proceed with each stage. Do not rush your child, give them time to sit and wait for them to pee or poop. Talk about what they are doing and reassure them that this is. a new job to do, just like learning to walk.

Bring A Toy To The Toilet

Another idea is to let your child take a toy with them to the bathroom to distract them from how long it takes to make the poop. Some parents let them take a teddy to the toilet and tell the teddy what they are doing.

They’re Not Missing Out

Often children will resist going to the toilet as they don’t want to miss out on playing. 

This is especially the case with children with autism as they do not like their routine being disturbed.

Let them know that they will go back to play as soon as they are finished!

Social Stories for Kids About Toilet Training

Social Stories for kids about toileting that focus on all the steps involved in the process, can be of great value and fun. Sequence stories and visual cues help to teach your child vocabulary. These kinds of stories can be found online, and can often be customized to meet your child’s needs! This story from Jessica Bander is a great resource for potty training: “ First use the toilet, and then get your reward .” 

Routine Plays an Important Part in Achieving Success in Toilet Training

Children with autism or developmental delays rely heavily on routines. When starting toilet training, it’s important to have house rules and maintain them even while training. This allows your child to know what is expected of them in other areas, such as cleaning up toys and washing hands before eating. 

In the same way, you can instill a routine for toilet training. This routine can look a lot like what has worked for your child in other areas. Use what has worked for you up until now with other activities. Try using picture cues and a timer to schedule half-hour trips to the bathroom initially. You can have a sticker chart in the bathroom or offer rewards such as cookies.

Reward your child for every small beginning, even if it is a few drops of urine. It’s important to reward the child immediately after the event so that they associate the reward with toilet training, just as you would do for the other routines you’ve set up. 

It may be difficult, but try not to focus on your child’s mistakes, rather on what they can do. Praise them to acknowledge their frustration when they make mistakes.

Sensory Issues

A sensory processing disorder involves the child’s hypersensitivity to the five senses. Below are some examples of how these senses might be triggered when potty training with your child. 

Touch 

The feel of the seat on their bottom might be cold, or it might be hard. The toilet paper might be scratchy to use. 

Sound 

The loud sound of the toilet flushing.

Vision 

How their poop or urine looks.

Smell 

The smell of their own poo or other smells associated with the bathroom.

Body awareness 

Some aspects may be unpleasant for them. The pressure of a full bladder or the cramping of an impending bowel movement may feel uncomfortable. Having to take off pants and undies and sit without them on. They may feel insecure with the change of wearing a diaper compared to the toilet.

Although taste is not directly related to the above senses for toilet training, many “picky eaters” have difficulty with toilet training. This often just means that they struggle with a lot of their senses, and the bathroom is just another area. 

You may already be aware of the sensory issues that your child with Autism or ADHD has in other areas before you start potty training. They may have any one or more of these sensory aversions to going to the toilet. You will know if your child has sensory issues, and you most likely will have dealt with them before.

Wiping Is the Final Stage in Toilet Training

The final stage of toilet training your child is teaching them how to wipe properly. This can be difficult for children with sensory issues, but luckily, there are many teachers and therapists across the web who have created some helpful ways to teach this. 

The most important stage of wiping is to teach your child “how to reach around.” You can hold their hand and demonstrate the action while they’re on the toilet. Verbal cues can be: “finish the job.” Continue to use rewards to encourage them to finish wiping. It’s also important to monitor their wiping and prompt them to take enough time and use enough physical pressure to remove the poo from their bums. 

This Video Will Help Your Kid Learn How To Wipe Themselves

We don’t teach essential skills in American schools. pic.twitter.com/OnKwolhKVY — jamie (@gnuman1979) October 10, 2019

This teacher has a brilliant idea and shared a video on Twitter to help share the process. We’re not sure where the video originated, but this teacher should be  given all the awards  for saving us the struggle…and giving us a laugh. 

Although we think this is a great teachable moment, we noticed the balloons are positioned higher than their actual bum would be. So, before you try this at home, move them down a little. 

You don’t want your kid to learn to just wipe the top of their bum.

Help Is Always at Hand

It’s not easy to stay positive sometimes, so share your experiences with other mothers or therapists at The Therapy Place . Our therapists empathize with you regarding the difficulties of potty training.

If you sense what is causing your child’s fears, be open and honest. Talk about the senses and changes that they may be feeling. Parent support groups are great to brainstorm words to use during toilet training rather than negative words or scolding or pleading. 

Parents often ask how they must react when their child becomes oppositional to potty training.

A Psychologist or Behavioral therapist may also assist in finding solutions to your individual challenges, such as co-operation, response to rewards that worked before, or uneasiness with the process of toileting. Parents are a vital part of a successful therapy process and must sit on sessions to learn from the experience.

Do not hesitate to contact us if you are not having success with the toilet training of your child. We are here to help you. Our Occupational Therapists will help you with the sensory issues, while our Speech Therapists will help you with the level of language instruction and visual symbols to use for the stages in toilet training.

We hope that these ideas and tips will be useful in the process of toilet training your child with developmental delays, autism or sensory processing issues. You can also consult your pediatrician for assistance at any of the stages in the toilet training process. This assistance can be invaluable as the pediatrician knows your child as a whole little person!

Remember that our dedicated team of therapists is always available to discuss any issues you may be having with toilet training or any other milestone events.

References – APA 7

Cocchiola, M. A., Jr, Martino, G. M., Dwyer, L. J., & Demezzo, K. (2012). Toilet training children with autism and developmental delays: an effective program for school settings.  Behavior Analysis in Practice ,  5 (2), 60–64. https://doi.org/10.1007/BF03391824

Eales, P. B. K., Director, B. R., & San Diego Gateway Learning Group. (n.d.).  Toilet training individuals with developmental disabilities . Cigna.Com. Retrieved December 14, 2021, from https://www.cigna.com/static/www-cigna-com/es-us/docs/individuals-families/health-wellness/topic-autism/may-autism-handout.pdf

HealthyChildren.Org – from the American academy of pediatrics . (n.d.). Healthychildren.Org. Retrieved December 14, 2021, from http://www.healthychildren.org

Social Story-Potty Training-Girl . (n.d.). Teacherspayteachers.Com. Retrieved December 14, 2021, from https://www.teacherspayteachers.com/Product/Social-Story-Potty-Training-Girl-675158

Today’s Parent – Pregnancy, baby, toddler advice for Canadian parents . (n.d.). Todaysparent.Com. Retrieved December 14, 2021, from http://www.todaysparent.com

Toilet training children with special needs . (n.d.). Healthychildren.Org. Retrieved December 14, 2021, from https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/toddler/toilet-training/Pages/Toilet-Training-Children-with-Special-Needs.aspx

(N.d.). Autismspeaks.Org. Retrieved December 14, 2021, from https://www.autismspeaks.org/worksheet/personalized-teaching-story-potty-training

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Speech Delay and Potty Training Children

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Potty training takes time and patience. The link between speech delay and potty training may make it more challenging for your child. However, generally speaking, most children will be ready to start potty training between 18 months and 3 years. It is important to not pressure your child to try. They will show you the signs when they are ready to start potty training.

Signs your toddler wants to start potty training:

• They want to become more independent.
• Your child does not like being wet or dirty.
• Your child shows they may need to go through fidgeting or moving somewhere quiet.
• Your child may tell you while they are wetting themselves.

These are just some of the signs indicating they may be ready to begin potty training. Typically children by the age of 3 will be dry most days. They may have the occasional accident when they are excited or upset. By around the age of 4, your child will be dry during the day. However, your child may need extra time to stay dry throughout the night (NHS, 2022) .

The link between speech delay and potty training - is there an impact? 

In order to be potty trained , your child will need to have an understanding of verbal communication, and follow simple instructions, gestures, or signs. Your child may find it difficult to understand and associate words with actions. For example, “pull your pants down” may require your child extra processing time before completing the task.

Can you potty train a nonverbal toddler?

Is your child able to let you know they need to use the toilet? If your child has a speech delay or is nonverbal, they may not be able to tell you they need to go to the potty. It is important, as a parent , to read their cues. You can support them in expressing their need to go to the toilet. This can be through verbally using words, gestures, or signs. For example, "do you need the potty?" and "let's use the potty".

Potty training is an imperative skill that your child will need to learn. A speech delay and potty training are interlinked, and often, it may affect your child's progress. However, let's try some of our tips below to support your toddler through learning this skill.

How do you potty train a toddler with a language delayed - 10 Tips and tricks

Potty training is hard work for you and your child. It will take large amounts of practice - it can take up to a year! Here are some tips and tricks to help you on your journey with your child to master potty training:

• You will need to set aside time to practice potty training. It will require commitment, but once they have it, it is a skill for life!
• If your child attends school or nursery, ensure you all work together and keep in contact. So that your child is potty training consistently across all environments.
• Be consistent with your method of delivering toilet training! Practice your chosen method for 3 weeks to see if it works. The results will not be instant.
• Understand your child’s routine. It would be useful to spend 1-2 weeks creating a visual chart with the times of the day your child; eats, drinks, wets, soils, get changed and sleeps. Look at your data and see if there is a pattern. For example, they wet themselves 20 minutes after each meal. Use this as a guide to when you can attempt potty training, as this will have the most impact.
• Use praise whenever they use the potty and use a reward system! Use items e.g. toys, stickers, and treats as a reward for completing potty training. This will help to keep your child motivated and engaged.
• Use visual supports to help your child understand the vocabulary and actions. Use pictures at each stage of the potty routine. For example, “pull pants down” and “sit on the toilet”.
• Keep it positive! Do not punish your child if they have a potty accident. Model language to your child and narrative what has happened. For example, “you are wet” and take your child’s hand and lead them to the potty. If they are successful in following your instructions, give verbal praise and use their reward system. Even small steps are a win. Reward these behaviors e.g. pulling down their pants or sitting on the potty. It's a marathon, not a sprint!
• Books can be used to explain the potty routine. It can show toilet training in a fun and interesting way using characters and colorful pictures. Here are some book suggestions for potty training: Pirate Polly’s Potty Andrea Pinnington, Pirate Pete Potty Andrea Pinnington, I want my potty! Tony Ross, No More Nappies: A Potty Training Book Campbell Books & Marion Cocklico. ‍
• Be patient. Your child may take a little longer to learn the skills. It may take weeks before your child begins to be successful. Go at your child’s pace and be patient. This will help them learn the skills and reduce the frustration of your child and yourself.
• Try not to compare your child’s progress with another child of the same age. Make it a fun process and create a relaxed environment.

Although potty training and speech delay children may take more time, it is important to not avoid the learning process. Have fun with it and make it an engaging activity for your child. You may find your child wants to use the toilet instead of the potty. A trainer seat that hooks onto your toilet, may allow your child to feel safer and more confident on the toilet. A step for your child to place their feet on may support a better position on the toilet. If your child is a boy, encouraging them to sit and wee, may be easier to transition when they need t go.

Do you need more support on potty training and speech delay?

Feel free to get in touch with our team of certified speech professionals. We're here to support you. Book a free call at this link , no strings attached.

Recommended Book for parents:

American Academy of Pediatrics Guide to Toilet Training: Revised and Updated Edition: Revised and Updated Second Edition (2016)

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Harmonizing the Chaos

Potty Training with a Speech Delay

July 5, 2023 · In: Lifestyle , Motherhood Last Modified: April 25, 2024

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Tips I Successfully Used to Potty Train My Toddler

We are just a few months in from being potty trained; I sometimes still can’t believe our success! Now, this is daytime potty training; we have not attempted the nap and nighttime potty training. Mainly because I’m a pregnant, exhausted mamma, and I don’t feel the need to tackle that right now. One of our biggest hurdles? Successfully potty training with a speech delay. My son was two years and four months old when we started, and he still only has a few words.

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When to start potty training a toddler with a speech delay

In my mind, I had assumed I would start this potty training process once my toddler would begin saying “pee” and “poopie,” or at least start letting me know when he would go in the diaper. We had friends that visited us here in Germany when the boys were just under two ( they are two months apart ), and his vocabulary was impressive- in fact, he would let his parents know when he would make a poopie or a pee in the diaper. This, I thought, would be our first signs of readiness.

When I finally decided to start this new chapter of potty training, my son still only had a few words. He essentially communicates with hand signing and certain sound effects. 

I would ask him if he made a poopie in the diaper, and he would say no. He didn’t mind being in a dirty diaper- mainly because he was just too busy to want to be changed. 

How did I know my son was ready to start potty training? Call it mothers intuition, I just knew. Honestly, I wanted to start a month prior, but we were taking our two-week trip to Italy and thought the diapers would be far more convenient than looking for toilets. He was showing interest in the entire process. Also, he had been so rushed to grow up that I was hoping for he would ready.

How we helped prepare my delayed speech toddler for potty training

Lead by example.

For the last year or so, I would communicate what I was doing in the bathroom. We even purchased a potty for him placed right next to our toilet. At some point, he started to sit on it next to me. He loved pushing the flusher on it. We kept it in the bathroom; it was never considered a toy for him to play with. Think of this as visual reinforcements . After some time, he would even tear a little bit of toilet paper and throw it into his potty, then flush. This was the top indicator that made me feel like he was ready- he had been showing interest.

Communicate with simple language

I would make it a point to say, “You made a poopie” when cleaning up the diaper, or your going pee if he did while standing in the bathtub ( my toddler still hates taking baths). Although he couldn’t say the words, his receptive speech is fantastic, and I wanted him to start learning these terms. I also made it a point to say that “Mommy is making a poopie.” My goal was to normalize this as much as possible; I didn’t want him to develop any feelings of shame with going number two.

It was also a great opportunity to say step by step what I was doing.

Tips that worked for me for potty training with a speech delay

Know how your child communicates.

This is a bit more challenging when you have a speech-delayed toddler. Think outside the box. How has your child been communicating with you? Use this method! We rely heavily on signing- it has been, hands down, one of the best blessings for us. A few signs have been made up, but they work. My son also has certain sound effects that he uses. My husband and I are completely tuned in to his form of communication. 

My son doesn’t use the visual charts , but they can be an excellent tool for potty training your speech-delayed toddler! I considered using them as an option. I even considered using stickers on the chart as a reward system. Start using this chart or signing when you are using the bathroom to start reinforcing this means of communication.    

Include your spouse and family

I kept putting it off potty training toddler with a speech delay, not because I didn’t think my son was ready- but was I ready? Was I prepared to tackle this? Life is already more exhausting being pregnant- did I want to complicate it even more? I kept finding an excuse to put it off for the next week. Eventually, my husband said something to the effect of – Liam is going to be four and still not potty trained. Well, that comment got me started on it that day! 

My husband was understanding and let me take the reins in this. But I kept him in the loop. What I wanted to do and how I wanted to do it. Communicating this to him allowed him to be involved and supportive. Also, this can be exhausting and stressful; I knew I needed encouragement and affirmation.

Pick out the big boy/ girl undies

Let them get excited! Have them pick out some undies! I decided to go straight for the undies instead of the pull-ups. Out of convenience, I ordered some that my toddler would love and showed them to him. I told him that we are going to start wearing these this week after we start potty training.

Plan for a week of staying at home

The first three days we spent at home- which was tough! Both my toddler and I need to spend time outside. It is consistently part of our daily schedule . These first three days were exhausting! I felt like we were in the trenches. So much so that I had to actively try to incorporate some of my self-care into that morning routine ; these three days were the hardest- but then it got easier!

Staying at home gave me more control. It also removed any outside distractions that could hinder the potty training process. It is also the most comfortable environment for my toddler. I felt like this was a huge part of going all in with my potty training method. 

It can be challenging having a toddler with delayed speech. It can be deceiving as to how much he understands; I often underestimate his receptive vocabulary. 

Communicate with your toddler

I told him that morning what we were doing:

• We are not going outside today
• Today we are going to learn how to pee and poopie in your potty
• Mommy is going to take your diaper off during the day
• Mommy is putting on your diaper on because it is nap time or bedtime
• If you have an accident, that is okay

Set a schedule for potty training your toddler with a speech delay

The timing approach didn’t work well for us; it was inconsistent. I also couldn’t get my toddler to spend time on the potty, even with toys, books, or the tv. However, I have heard of many mamas succeeding with these two methods and would try it again for our second child.  The first day was a complete mess! My goal: I had to learn his schedule when he needed to use the potty. The first day, there was none- but by the third day, he developed one. I learned quickly that I would have to adopt his schedule into our daily routine . 

As the week went on, I would ask before going out if he needed to go. Sometimes he would sit on his potty, while others, he would refuse. He is as stubborn as they come- I have not successfully made him sit on the potty against his will. I have had to work with him. I had to learn his pattern

Have the potty easily accessible

We had a separate potty for him that I placed in the middle of our living room. Prepare for your little one, it’s likely they give no warning the first few days. I would grab my son midstream and sit him on the potty. 

If you’re using a potty seat on your toilet, I would encourage you to be close to that bathroom. You want the potty to be convenient. 

Push those fluids!

You want your toddler to pee; the more they need to go, the more practice opportunities they have.

Understand that Pooping in the potty can take more time

I’ve been told kids can struggle with going poopie in the potty. Have a little more patience. Thankfully, my son didn’t struggle with this. However, he would immediately throw up. This went on for about a month.

Establish a rewards system

I think this is personal preference. You know what works well for your child. Some of my mommas did stickers, treats, or little toys. My son is spoiled. But what worked for him was affirmation. Pure joy and exaggerated praise. This may also be a bit of trial and error.

Celebrate every victory

I was so proud when my son learned to stop midstream and finish in the potty. Every little step is a victory- celebrate it! Every small success will lead to a bigger victory!

The first two to three days were the hardest. This first phase was all about my son learning what this sensation was and eventually being able to feel it coming. It was a couple of days filled with accidents-  everywhere. Be patient . Take a few seconds to step away now and then. These first few days, I was in the trenches. Your toddler will sense any frustration you may have. 

Let your toddler know that accidents are okay. Be their safe space

My son felt so bad every time he had an accident. It was almost as if he had some feelings of shame- this was a surprise for me! Potty training was an emotional experience for my little one. I made sure to tell him every single time in a calm voice that it was an accident and accidents were okay. Even through the exhaustion- I think this is so important. He would even make it a point to take me to the accident, energy, and say uh-oh. Accidents are accidents, and that’s okay. I want him to learn from an early age that he can always come to me if he is in trouble or has an accident. I do like to think that how I respond now could affect how he comes to me when he’s older.

How to mentally prepare yourself for this potty training journey

This was the hurdle I needed to overcome. The concern that potty training my speech-delayed toddler would complicate my already exhausted life. Giving up the convenience of diapers. 

Even though my intuition told me that my son was ready for potty training for the first time, I doubted myself . Would I be capable of successfully potty training my son? As a pregnant military spouse living overseas- did I want to make my life harder?

Educate yourself

A couple of months before potty training, I read through the first portion of Oh Crap, Potty Training by Jamie Clowacki. Unfortunately, I didn’t dive into the book completely. Between being pregnant, my blogging hobby , and often solo parenting, I skimmed through the first half. Even by just looking, I thought it was a fantastic resource, and it gave me a great starting point. Really- a lot of the foundation stemmed from this book! I would absolutely recommend it!

I was not shy about asking friends what they did and their methods. It was interesting to hear what worked for them. Many mommas had sworn by their techniques and were passionate about how they did it. Like motherhood, when you open up this discussion, this feedback can be overwhelming. Thankfully, most of the mommas were simply encouraging! You may wish to keep potty training to yourself until you get through it. 

As I mentioned earlier, including family is important in the potty training method and journey. But having that affirmation, encouragement, and support from them can go a long way. Remember how this felt when you have friends reach out to you when they start their potty training journey!

Prepare for the accidents

There will be accidents- especially the first few days. Have your carpet cleaner on hand. Make sure you have plenty of towels available. I tried to have him sit on a towel when he was on the sofa.  I could leave the room for 2.5 seconds, and my son would not fail to have an accident. It will happen. 

Remember to take care of yourself. If you feel like you are overwhelmed and easily frustrated, step away for a few minutes. Take a deep breath. Practice squeezing some self-care into your day. Keep up your hobbies !

My takeaway for potty training a toddler with a speech delay

It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be . My son picked it up faster than I thought, and I handled the entire process okay. Despite the speech delay, my toddler can effectively communicate when he needs to use the potty. It’s a proud moment for you and your little one. Wear that badge!

I would love to hear what worked for you! Do you have any additional tips for your little one?

About Sarah Dedo

Sarah Christine is a Nurse Practitioner, military spouse, and mommy of two little kids. She loves sharing her challenges and adventures of this military life to inspire others!

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Reader Interactions

July 5, 2023 at 12:13 pm

My mom owns a preschool that I worked at for a few years. I was in the potty training classroom and we had two nonverbal students. Your tips are absolutely fantastic! Having your child get excited about “big boy” or “big girl” underwear is a great tip for anyone! When it comes to potty training nonverbal students, I wish we had this guide! We used the visual chart with both children and it worked so well for one but not so much for the other. I bet so many of these tips would have been helpful to us. Thanks for sharing such a helpful post!

January 12, 2024 at 7:08 pm

Thank you so much for your comment! It is so challenging, especially since certain tools will work for certain kids.

July 5, 2023 at 1:52 pm

Such a great article. What an awesome mama you are! I found potty training hard enough without the added extra stress of toddler speech delay. So you are incredible 🙂

July 5, 2023 at 4:42 pm

Great post; I’m in the midst of potty training (round two!). We first attempted it just after mine turned two…she seemed ready enough, but it was so hard. After a few weeks, I decided to call it quits and we went back to diapers. We just started again a few weeks ago, and it’s been so much better. Going #2 is a challenge still, but everything has been so much better. I read the same book you mentioned by Jamie Clowacki and it was helpful, but didn’t 100% work for us. As you said, and with everything related to raising kids, you have to find what works for both you and your kid. I’m happy where we are at right now with potty training and I know going #2 will come eventually!

January 12, 2024 at 7:07 pm

Potty training is so hard!! I hope round two went well. And it’s truly different for every kid!

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Potty training: How to get the job done

Potty training is a major milestone. Get the facts on timing, technique and handling accidents.

Potty training is a big step for kids — and their parents. The secret to success? Timing and patience.

Is it time?

Potty training success hinges on physical, developmental and behavioral milestones, not age. Many children show signs of being ready for potty training between ages 18 and 24 months. However, others might not be ready until they're 3 years old. There's no rush. If you start too early, it might take longer to train your child.

Is your child ready? Ask yourself:

• Can your child walk to and sit on a toilet?
• Can your child pull down his or her pants and pull them up again?
• Can your child stay dry for up to two hours?
• Can your child understand and follow basic directions?
• Can your child communicate when he or she needs to go?
• Does your child seem interested in using the toilet or wearing "big-kid" underwear?

If you answered mostly yes, your child might be ready. If you answered mostly no, you might want to wait — especially if your child is about to face a major change, such as a move or the arrival of a new sibling.

Your readiness is important, too. Let your child's motivation, instead of your eagerness, lead the process. Try not to equate potty training success or difficulty with your child's intelligence or stubbornness. Also, keep in mind that accidents are inevitable and punishment has no role in the process. Plan toilet training for when you or a caregiver can devote the time and energy to be consistent on a daily basis for a few months.

Ready, set, go!

When it's time to begin potty training:

• Choose your words. Decide which words you're going to use for your child's bodily fluids. Avoid negative words, such as dirty or stinky.
• Prepare the equipment. Place a potty chair in the bathroom or, initially, wherever your child is spending most of his or her time. Encourage your child to sit on the potty chair in clothes to start out. Make sure your child's feet rest on the floor or a stool. Use simple, positive terms to talk about the toilet. You might dump the contents of a dirty diaper into the potty chair and toilet to show their purpose. Have your child flush the toilet.
• Schedule potty breaks. Have your child sit on the potty chair or toilet without a diaper for a few minutes at two-hour intervals, as well as first thing in the morning and right after naps. For boys, it's often best to master urination sitting down, and then move to standing up after bowel training is complete. Stay with your child and read a book together or play with a toy while he or she sits. Allow your child to get up if he or she wants. Even if your child simply sits there, offer praise for trying — and remind your child that he or she can try again later. Bring the potty chair with you when you're away from home with your child.
• Get there — Fast! When you notice signs that your child might need to use the toilet — such as squirming, squatting or holding the genital area — respond quickly. Help your child become familiar with these signals, stop what he or she is doing, and head to the toilet. Praise your child for telling you when he or she has to go. Keep your child in loose, easy-to-remove clothing.
• Explain hygiene. Teach girls to spread their legs and wipe carefully from front to back to prevent bringing germs from the rectum to the vagina or bladder. Make sure your child washes his or her hands afterward.
• Ditch the diapers. After a couple of weeks of successful potty breaks and remaining dry during the day, your child might be ready to trade diapers for training pants or underwear. Celebrate the transition. Let your child return to diapers if he or she is unable to remain dry. Consider using a sticker or star chart for positive reinforcement.

If your child resists using the potty chair or toilet or isn't getting the hang of it within a few weeks, take a break. Chances are he or she isn't ready yet. Pushing your child when he or she isn't ready can lead to a frustrating power struggle. Try again in a few months.

Nighttime training

Nap time and nighttime training typically takes longer to achieve. Most children can stay dry at night between ages 5 and 7. In the meantime, use disposable training pants and mattress covers when your child sleeps.

Accidents will happen

To handle accidents:

• Stay calm. Don't scold, discipline or shame your child. You might say, "You forgot this time. Next time you'll get to the bathroom sooner."
• Be prepared. Keep a change of underwear and clothing handy, especially at school or in child care.

When to seek help

If your child seems ready for potty training but is having difficulties, talk to your child's doctor. He or she can give you guidance and check to see if there's an underlying problem.

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• Turner TL, et al. Toilet training. https://www.uptodate.com/contents/search. Accessed July 16, 2019.
• Toilet training. American Academy of Pediatrics. https://patiented.solutions.aap.org/handout.aspx?gbosid=156575&resultClick=1. Accessed July 16, 2019.
• Berkowitz CD. Toilet training: In: Berkowitz's Pediatrics: A Primary Care Approach. 5th ed. Elk Grove Village, Ill.: American Academy of Pediatrics; 2014.
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Potty Training a Toddler with a Speech Delay

Saying farewell to diapers is huge for parents and their toddlers. There’s a feeling of freedom. I know, it’s odd, but getting rid of the diapers is so freeing. It’s hard at first for any toddler. Potty training a toddler with speech delay issues is even more challenging.

There are many ways to overcome communication challenges between you and your toddler. Especially if they have a speech delay or other issues with communicating. I think you’ll find that learning other cues and methods will more than make up for the challenge this presents.

Identify Bladder and Bowel Timing

Getting them to use the potty is one thing. The hardest part? Knowing when. If you can’t communicate with them at first (and they can’t communicate with you), where do you start? Consider this: chart when they pee or poop. After doing this, you’ll have a good starting point for knowing at least when they are most likely to need to use the potty.

Once you have these observations down, set-up a routine. Work towards getting your toddler to sit on the potty at these times every day. If there is resistance, try not to force it. But it’s likely that he or she will follow your lead. By now your toddler is probably starting to trend away from diapers anyway, and is probably welcoming the idea of sitting on the potty. For most kids, any routine helps make a transition easier.

You may want to also include other set times for the potty. For instance, before meals is perfect. This also ensures that your little one will wash her hands before eating. Before bedtime is another time to consider. For us, we always set aside potty time whenever we leave the house―even if it’s just to play outside. No one likes their playtime interrupted!

Follow Nonverbal Cues

Remember when your little one was just a little ball of cuteness? I know, they still are. But how did they let you know what they wanted? If they were hungry or wet, chances are that you followed their nonverbal cues and gestures. As their mom, you know them better than anyone. Whenever they are feeling something, you just know. Take that knowledge into the bathroom with you. Like all their other needs, the cues for using the potty will be there too.

Along those lines, consider hanging a “potty chart” in the bathroom. A sheet of poster board is perfect for this. List each time when they need to go (based on their observed behaviors) and let them put a sticker on the board when they try to go. Don’t make it performance based. Instead, reward them for making the effort, even on those near misses. They’ll adore this. Most of all, they’ll be getting the attention and praise from you they are always craving.

Consider adding in some sign language. Most infants and young toddlers use some form of signing to express themselves. For instance, my daughter was great at signing when she wanted more food, and for saying please. It made understanding one another much easier when she was younger.

Don’t Forget the Books!

Storytime is perfect for potty training. For a toddler with speech delay, picture books are a perfect introduction to anything. The pictures spell out everything without words. And you can still read the words (and should) to develop their vocabulary. For older toddlers, there are even graphic novels (i.e., comics) that handle all kinds of topics. So, books are great not only for potty training but for most any issue you may come across.

An added bonus for using books is that they show other children in similar circumstances. Any change can bring fear or anxiety. Seeing other children their age should help calm those fears.

Make it a point to leave some of the books in the bathroom. We keep a small magazine rack by the toilet. If they have a hard time going poop, picking up a book is a fine distraction. It takes some of the anxiety out of the equation. Further, by reading them a book (or several) while sitting on the potty, you can dramatically extend the amount of time they spend sitting, and increase the likelihood that something good will happen. Remember, your toddler’s speech delay causes anxiety for both of you. Don’t add to it with potty training. Instead, make the bathroom as comfortable a place as possible.

Keep it Positive

This is a big moment for your toddler. Since they can’t tell you what’s going on in their minds, you’ll need to be extra attentive to their cues. Along those lines positive reinforcement will always work best. Potty training any child is a challenge. Add in a speech delay or any other challenge, and the goal of potty training is a huge mountain to climb.

While we want to ditch the diapers, it’s important not to make this transition our own. It’s about our kids and setting them up to succeed. I’ve been frustrated numerous times at all stages with my kids. What I discovered is that my own frustration was usually what impeded their progress. So let’s face it, accidents will happen. It’s all in how we approach them.

The chart referenced earlier is a great way to keep your child involved. It offers the visual stimulation to keep them focused. It communicates what they cannot verbally communicate. And it offers a positive response for their behavior. An accident on the way to the bathroom? Don’t fuss over it. Instead, offer praise for the attempt to get to the bathroom on time. Praise all the positives in their attempts to use the potty. For those small failures, correct only when needed. Highlight the positives and allow those memories to stand out.

Your toddler is at a significant milestone when the diapers come off and they step into their big kid underwear. For kids with speech delays, unnecessary anxiety could fill that transition. Potty training is always a challenge for any child. Instead of adding to their worries, do what you do best. Listen to their actions and empathize with their emotions. Success is sure to follow.

Emily Anderson is a mother of three children, all under the age of 10. Located in the Pacific Northwest of the US, Emily is a mom and part-time blogger, jumping in front of the computer when the kids are sleeping. She started this blog in April of 2019 and is proud that the blog is now paying for itself. If you want to know about her journey as a blogger, check out out her personal digital journal or her post about failing her way to blogging success .

Ages & Stages

Potty Training Children with Special Needs

The issue of when and how to begin toilet training can be particularly challenging for parents of children with special needs. The sense of accomplishment when they do succeed in this important aspect of self-care can make an enormous difference in their level of self-esteem .

Perhaps more than other parents, those who have children with physical, intellectual, or developmental disabilities can appreciate the toilet-training process as a way to follow and celebrate a child’s overall growth. Rather than focusing negatively on setbacks, which are inevitable in any case, they can use the setbacks as opportunities to discover how their child learns best and to demonstrate to them that they are able to progress.

Toilet training works best when parents of children with special needs have access to the guidance, instruction, and encouragement of their pediatrician, other trained professionals (including school personnel), support groups, or a combination of all . The first step you must take is to determine whether your child is ready to begin.

Signs of potty training readiness are the same for your child as for all children:

Is your child aware of the difference between being wet and being dry?

Can they stay dry for at least two hours at a time?

Can they sense when he needs to urinate or have a bowel movement?

Are they capable of reaching the toilet or potty in time (perhaps with your help)?

Can they undress and dress themselves or are they ready to learn?

Are they motivated at some level to take this next step?

If your child is in a resistant phase, is not ready to take on a new challenge, or does not yet feel the urge to behave "like other kids" in this way, you might take some extra time to prepare them mentally before starting the potty training process.

If you feel that your child is ready, ask your pediatrician for their opinion. They can examine your child to offer a physical assessment and perhaps special insight into the particular needs of your child. They can also provide further information that you may need before starting, and let you know what types of special equipment may be advisable.

It is also important to prepare yourself emotionally before you and your child begin the process. Children with special needs often begin toilet training later than other children, frequently completing the process at age five years old or even later. Of course, children with some conditions may always need help with their clothing (button, zippers, tights) and some might need help getting to the bathroom. Some will develop innovative ways of achieving independence.

Learning to use the toilet can be physically painful to some, and challenging for others to understand. Accidents will happen, of course, and you will need to draw on an extra dose of patience and humor when they occur. Ask for help from your spouse, relatives or friends before you begin.

Physical challenges

A number of physical disabilities and illnesses can hinder a child’s ability to become fully toilet-trained or easily adjust to bathroom use. If your child faces such a challenge, you will need to think about how their unique situation affects each stage of toilet training and how you can compensate. Whether your child is unable to sense the need to urinate, has difficulty getting onto or staying on a standard potty or toilet or must adjust or readjust to toilet use after having used an ostomy device, they will need extra support from you and their other caregivers as they learn to master this new skill.

Visual disabilities

Children with visual disabilities and those with sight deficiencies experience a disadvantage at several stages of toilet training. First, they might be unable to observe family members and peers using the toilet, so they cannot mimic their behavior. So many details of toilet or potty use—where the potty is in the bathroom, how the body is oriented to it as one sits down, how the urine and poop get into the potty, how one tears off and uses toilet paper—are simple to understand if a child can observe the process but difficult if they cannot. Without sight to help them, your child will need to rely more on language to understand how the process works. Because of this, you will probably want to wait a little longer to begin potty training—until they are three or four years old (or even later, since language delays can accompany blindness)—so that they can fully comprehend what you are telling her.

When you are ready to introduce your child with a visual impairment to the concept of toilet use, start bringing them with you when you use the bathroom. Allow them to explore the bathroom and locate the toilet. (Be sure it’s well ventilated and smells pleasant so they will want to return.) Place their hands on your shoulders so they can feel you sitting on the toilet, explain what you are doing and why, and guide her hands to the toilet paper dispenser. Also show them the flush handle and the sink for hand washing.

Once you have placed a potty in the bathroom, lead them to it, let them accustom herself to its presence, and keep it in the same place throughout the toilet-training process. Talk to them about toilet use at other times, too—pointing out that most of the people they knows use the toilet and that toilet use is a sign of being a big kid who can take care of themselves.

Once your child begins practicing potty use themselves, keep the bathroom and the passage to it clear of obstacles. A musical potty that is activated when urine hits the bowl might make the learning process more fun. Teach them to feel the inner edge of the seat before tossing in the toilet paper and, if the child is a boy urinating standing up at a toilet, to position his body so he doesn’t urinate on the toilet itself. (You may want to have your son first sit to urinate; once he masters that skill, then you can teach him to stand in front of the toilet.)

Finally, as your child grows more comfortable with bathroom use, make a point of taking them to the bathroom at each public place you visit. By helping them familiarize themselves with the wide variety of bathroom layouts and toilet styles, you will help build their self-confidence when away from home and prevent accidents. And don’t forget to reward their progress with praise, hugs or a small reward.

Hearing disabilities

Children who are deaf or have difficulty hearing may or may not find toilet training challenging, depending on their ability to communicate. A child who is already fluent in sign language can rely on a combination of visual observation and explanations from you to understand what’s expected of them—much like any other child. Children who do not yet have the ability to understand your signals and simple signs may not be ready for toilet training until they are somewhat older.

The key to training in these cases is to keep the process simple. When introducing the concept, emphasize the visual: Allow your child to observe you (and, even better, other children) using the bathroom, and show them picture books about it. Choose one gesture or sign for the essential terms (pee, poop, potty, wet, dry, and need to go). Use these gestures each time you use the bathroom, and use them with them as well—signing "wet" (with a sad face) when you change her diaper or wet underwear, "dry" (with a happy expression) once they've been changed, and "need to go" after lunch when it’s time to sit on the potty.

As long as you are consistent and stick with the half-dozen signals you need, your child will get the hang of potty use without longer explanations. When they do, be sure to reward them with plenty of hugs, stars on a potty chart or another small reward.

Continence problems

Some conditions have no effect on a child’s ability to understand the process of toilet training but make it difficult for a child to comply. Your child may grow increasingly frustrated in their efforts to stay dry and may even give up trying.

The best solution to this dilemma is to put your child on a regular potty schedule. By placing them on the potty frequently (reminding them every hour or so to visit the bathroom), you remove the burden of having to acknowledge so many times each day that they must interrupt an activity to tend to their physical needs. Going to the bathroom at the top of every hour can become a habit similar to brushing teeth twice a day or getting dressed in the morning—freeing her up to focus on other activities between visits.

Cerebral palsy

Children with cerebral palsy not only tend to be slow in developing bladder control, but may not have enough bladder awareness to begin toilet training at age two or three. If your child has cerebral palsy, they will need help to develop an awareness they needs to go (which may be signaled to you when you see them clutching their genitals or fidgeting anxiously) before they can begin toilet training. They will have to be able to delay urination until they are in position on the potty. They will need to remove their clothing and then hold themselves on the potty (with supports) long enough to achieve success. Again, these challenges mean that it is usually best to wait to toilet-train until they are older.

It is possible that limited physical activity, undeveloped muscle tone, or medications may cause constipation for your child with cerebral palsy. So, pay special attention to their diet as you start toilet-training. Make sure they are drinking plenty of fluids and eating foods high in fiber such as fruits and vegetables. As they begin to practice removing her clothes before getting onto the potty, make it easier by providing clothes with Velcro fasteners or loose elastic waistbands. (They may find it easier to remove her clothes while lying down.)

Spina bifida and spinal cord injury

Spina bifida , spinal cord injury, or spinal tumors create toilet-training problems for young children similar to those of cerebral palsy. But since most children with this condition never develop an awareness of when they need to go, few can ever fully use a toilet. You can, however, teach your child to remove urine through a catheter on a regular basis, and to visit the bathroom for bowel movements on a regular schedule. (A high-fiber diet with plenty of liquids and meals served on a regular schedule will make this process easier. Sometimes a stool softener or even a suppository or enema is needed.) Since your child will find it difficult to remove her clothing, be sure to provide them with Velcro fastened clothes and allow them to lie down to undress if necessary.

A child with spinal cord dysfunctions will likely not feel the need to move their bowels and have a greater risk of being constipated. Help prevent constipation by giving them enough fluids and a diet high in fiber. They may need to be on a bowel regimen designed so that they have a bowel movement at home and then does not have a bowel movement at school. Your pediatrician and therapist should be able to help develop a successful program for your child. They will need regular catheterizations, and either an aide or school nurse will have to help until your child can perform their own catheterizations.

Parents of children with physical disabilities such as cerebral palsy or spina bifida may become so distracted by the need for special equipment or physical support that they neglect the cognitive and emotional support that all children need to succeed at toilet training.

While installing that special potty in the bathroom, talk with your child about using the potty and why it’s important. Let them observe you and others using the bathroom, and praise and reward them when they succeed even a little bit. Resist the temptation to "let things go" when there is difficulty and remain firm about the schedule or routine you have created—unless the experience becomes negative and your child becomes very resistant. Remember, their progress is especially significant if it increases their self-confidence and prepares them for more challenges. Give them all the information, attention and support they need to succeed.

Behavioral and mental disorders

Your experience toilet-training a toddler who has been identified as having developmental or behavioral difficulties will depend a great deal on your particular child’s temperament, behavior patterns and coexisting conditions. Your knowledge of your child’s strengths, weaknesses, tendencies and interests will help the process.

Toilet training can be particularly trying for parents of children who have developmental disorders or behavioral difficulties. This includes those with autism , fetal alcohol syndrome (FAS) , oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) , and, in cases when it is diagnosed this early, attention deficit /hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) . Many children with these conditions may not be strongly motivated, or sufficiently equipped, to respond to the social reinforcements that work so well with other children ("What a big boy!"). For some, small tangible rewards such as a sticker or small toy can be effective.

Many find it extremely difficult to adjust to any change in routine. Some are particularly sensitive to touch and other sensory input and become upset by the frequent pulling off and on of clothing, the physical closeness with an adult and the unfamiliar surroundings of the bathroom.

For some children, simply learning the abstract concept of potty use can be complicated. For example, some children with behavioral disorders do not naturally imitate their parents’ or peers’ behavior. Others learn only through simple imitation or other concrete, nonverbal demonstrations. Such complications in the training process mean that early efforts can create a high level of frustration in your child and may lead to displays of temper, stubbornness, and refusal to cooperate.

Despite challenges, most children with special needs—whether they have physical challenges or behavioral issues—can be toilet trained, though in some cases the process may take up to a year or even longer. They may require help from an occupational or physical therapist or a rehabilitation engineer.

Your first step is to determine whether your child is ready to start training. Usually the time to think about beginning is when you notice that they can stay dry for an hour or more at a time, has regular bowel movements, is aware that he is about to pee or poop and dislikes being wet or soiled. It is also important to have your child examined by their pediatrician, since they may be at a higher risk for constipation or loose stools, which may interfere with training.

Once you have decided to begin, observe your child and consider carefully the specific traits, patterns of behavior, and obstacles that may impact their learning process. If they seems to dislike entering the bathroom, determine the cause of their discomfort. Is it the smell of disinfectant? The cold floor? The flushing toilet? Change or fix it if possible (change cleansers, put socks on their feet, move their potty away from the noisy toilet).

If they do not overtly signal the need to go, do they pause just before voiding or otherwise behave in a way that will provide you with a cue? At what times, or how long after eating or drinking, does he usually pee or poop? What foods, toys or other objects are they most passionate about? These can be used as tangible potty-training rewards, which may prove more effective than praise.

Identify how your child learns best. Some respond to firm but gentle physical demonstrations (being placed on the potty at regular times). Others do best with a formal routine containing a series of simple and predictable steps (verbally explained and reexplained, illustrated with pictures, or listed on a chart). Still others do best with offhand comments and conversations that inform without inviting resistance.

Intellectual Disabilities and Developmental Disorders

Most children with a developmental delay , an intellectual disability, or an autism spectrum disorder can be toilet-trained. The time it takes to achieve success ranges from a few months to a year or more. The process becomes easier as your child achieves at least a minimal level of verbal ability, is able to manage their clothes (perhaps with some help from you), and shows awareness of the need to go.

Toilet training for children with developmental delay, intellectual disability or autism spectrum disorder can be quite similar to training for other children, but sometimes it is not. Like with other children, as you introduce your child to the concept of potty use, it often helps to keep explanations simple. Start by checking the state of their diaper or pants every hour or so and offering a one-word, nonjudgmental comment when they are wet ("Wet!"). After you change them, smile and say "Dry!" If their verbal skills are limited, you might substitute a special gesture or sign for the words wet, dry, potty, need to go, and so on.

Begin bringing them to the bathroom with you when you need to use it. Smile and say "Dry!" after you’ve finished and pulled your pants up. If at all possible, have your child observe other children using the bathroom, too. They may make the connection between themselves and another child more easily than between themselves and you. After you’ve finished and are dressed, show them how happy you are and tell them "Dry!" If they have a favorite doll or stuffed animal, use it to play "potty," demonstrating again how the potty is used.

When they are ready to begin using the potty, begin setting them on it at regular times—quite frequently at first (as frequently as you checked them for wetness earlier) and then gradually settling down to the times when they usually go. Try to keep them on the potty for five or ten minutes at a time—keeping them company, reading to them, playing children’s music and otherwise ensuring that they stays in place long enough to succeed. Once they do urinate into the potty, give him a big smile and say "Pee!" (or whatever word you have chosen for this event). Help them wipe off and then praise them with a happy "Dry!" and give them a reward. Eventually, with enough repetition, they will understand the connection.

If your child has an intellectual disability or developmental delay, it is best to toilet train one step at a time. Don’t expect your child to learn to signal or announce their need to go, pull down their pants, use the potty, wipe their bottom and wash their hands all at once, the way their peers might. Toilet training will work best if you focus on the actual act of peeing and pooping first and address the other skills later. It is more important to keep them motivated than to achieve instant success.

Delayed Potty Training: Is it normal? What age is “too late”?

Parents often wonder if delayed potty training is normal. They may also be asking themselves what is too late when it comes to potty training. The answer to both of these questions is yes, delayed potty training is normal, and there is no such thing as too late when it comes to potty training. In this blog post, we will explore the reasons why delayed potty training occurs, and offer some tips on how parents can address it.

Is delayed potty training normal? Delayed potty training is defined as not being fully potty or toilet trained by age four. It’s normal for a child to take longer to be fully toilet trained and there are many reasons why delayed potty training occurs.

If your child is experiencing delayed potty training, it’s important to know that you’re not alone and figure out the reason why they may be taking a bit longer. For more information about delayed potty training keep reading, for the most common reasons for delayed potty training and what you can do about it.

Delayed Potty Training

Delayed potty training is when a child does isn’t fully toilet trained by the age of 4, or at the same time as other children their age.While delayed potty training can be a frustrating experience for both parents and children. It is important to remember that every child is different and that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to potty training.

There are a variety of reasons why potty training may be delayed. For some children, the process of learning to use the toilet may be overwhelming. Others may be reluctant to give up diapers, which can be a source of comfort. Additionally, some children simply aren’t ready physically or emotionally to start potty training.Whatever the reason for delayed potty training, there are some things that parents can do to help their children succeed.

Common Causes of Delayed Potty Training

Though it’s common for children to be potty trained by age three, some children may not be ready until age four or five. Delayed potty training is common problem and there are a number of reasons why it may occur. The most common reasons for delayed potty training is a fear of the toilet. This can be caused by a traumatic potty training experience, such as being scolded for making a mess. It can also be due to a simple dislike of the toilet itself. If a child is uncomfortable with the idea of using the toilet, they are unlikely to want to use it.

Another common cause is the child is not yet physically or mentally ready. Physically, the muscles needed for bowel and bladder control develop at different rates, so some children may not have the necessary muscle control until later. Psychologically, some children may not be ready to give up diapers. In this case, in order to be successful, they need to be highly motivated and interested in using the potty. 

Additionally, constipation can also be the cause of a potty training delay. When a child isn’t regularly receiving adequate hydration, fiber, vitamins and nutrients, they may become constipated. Which, can result in the child resisting the bathroom because they are afraid of the pain. This can lead to a vicious cycle, as the constipation gets worse and the child becomes even more reluctant to use the toilet.

Furthermore, some children simply take longer than others to learn how to use the toilet. There is no set timeline for potty training, and some children will take longer than others to master this skill. As long as you’re being consistent, patient, setting expectations, and encouraging your child, they will eventually catch on.

Tips for Addressing Delayed Potty Training

If you think that your child may be experiencing delayed potty training, there are some things that you can do to help them succeed..

One of the most important things that you can do is to stay positive and avoid putting pressure on your child. Potty training is a process, and it’s important to remember that every child is different. It can also be helpful to make the potty training process fun for your child. This can be done by letting them pick out their own potty seat, or by reading them books about going to the bathroom.

Additionally, you’ll want to be sure to praise your child for their successes, no matter how small. This will help them to feel encouraged and motivated to keep trying. Parents should also avoid putting pressure on their children. The process of potty training should be fun and stress-free. You should avoid punishing your child for accidents. This will only make the process more difficult and may cause your child to resist using the toilet even more.

If your child is having difficulty with potty training, it’s important to remember that delayed potty training is normal. Remain patient and understanding. All children will eventually learn to use the toilet, but some just more time than others and that’s okay.

10 Tips to Address Delayed Potty Training

• Encourage your child to use the toilet regularly, even if they don’t have to go. This will help them get used to the idea of using the toilet and make it a more regular part of their routine.
• Make sure that your child is comfortable with the toilet. If they are scared or uncomfortable, it will make it more difficult for them to use the toilet.
• Encourage your child to take breaks throughout the day to try and use the toilet. This will help them get into a regular routine of using the toilet.
• Talk to your child about their feelings and anxiety around delayed potty training. This will help them to feel more comfortable about the process and understand that it’s normal to feel this way.
• Make sure that you are providing adequate hydration, vitamins, and nutrients. This will help to avoid constipation, which can be a cause of delayed potty training.
• Praise your child for their successes, no matter how small. This will encourage them to keep trying.
• Avoid punishing your child for accidents. This will only make the process more difficult and may cause your child to resist using the toilet even more.
• Be patient and understanding. All children will eventually learn to use the toilet, but some just need more time than others.
• If you’re feeling frustrated, take a break. This will help to avoid putting pressure on your child and yourself. delayed potty training is normal and there is no need to rush the process.
• Potty training can be a difficult process for both children and parents alike. But by following these tips, you can make the process a

What Age is Too Late For Potty Training?

Most children are potty trained before the age of four, but some children may take longer. There is no need to worry if your child is delayed in potty training. Some children will take longer than others to master this skill, but as long as you’re being consistent, patient and encouraging, your child all children will eventually learn to use the toilet.

However, if you’re concerned about your child’s progress, you can talk to their doctor. They will be able to offer guidance, support, and additional tips and resources to help you and your child through this process. For more information about potty training age guides and what’s considered “too late” be sure to refer to “When To Start Potty-Training a Toddler: Age Guidelines for Girls, Boys, and Late Starters” for more information!

When to Seek Professional Help?

If you’re concerned about your child’s progress, you can talk to their doctor at anytime. It can never hurt and will surely be beneficial. If delayed potty training is causing significant stress or anxiety for either you or your child, it may be time to seek professional help. Additionally, if you suspect your child’s delay is due to a medical concern or developmental delay, professional help is essential. In these cases, a doctor or therapist will be able to offer the best path toward success.

5 Signs that it may be time to seek professional help foe delayed potty training:

• Delayed potty training is causing significant stress or anxiety for either you or your child.
• You suspect your child’s delay is due to a medical concern or developmental delay.
• Your child is over the age of four and still not showing any slight interest or progress in potty training.
• Potty training accidents are becoming more frequent and not improving.
• You’ve tried all of the tips and resources but your child is still delayed in potty training.

Motivation for Parents Who Are Feeling Discouraged

Don’t give up hope! Every child is different and will learn at their own pace. Just because your child is delayed in potty training does not mean they will never learn. Know that is is normal and also common. Understand you’re not the first or the only parent to experience delayed potty training.

If you’re struggling, take a break or reach out for help. It’s okay to ask for assistance, whether that be from friends, family, or professionals. Don’t be discouraged, your child will get there eventually! Just keep being encouraging, patient and consistent , your child will get there eventually. You got this!

Final Remarks

So there you have it, delayed potty training is normal and there is no need to worry if your child hasn’t mastered this skill yet. Just be patient, consistent, encouraging and talk to your pediatrician if you have any concerns.

Comments? Questions? Let us know! We would love to hear about your experiences with potty training! And don’t forget to check out out more of our potty training blog posts for more helpful tips and resources and subscribe for more helpful parenting content. Thanks for reading!

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